New month

I'm at a new pharmacy this month- I'm on rotation #7 of 9 total rotations. I still just can't believe I'm this close to graduating- 101 days away, to be exact.

Anyway, the rotation I'm on right now is not at all what I expected it to be- and that's only 2 days in. Sounds like a bad thing, right? It's actually an AWESOME thing! My preceptor is very involved in the profession and anything that has to do with wellness. And here I thought I was going to be counting by 5 over and over and counseling when I got the chance.

A little background about me- I was very involved in high school. I even was the president of the KAYS club (a community service club) during my senior year. I played sports, I was in chorale and Classy Ladies (a dancing/singing group), I was part of some Spanish honors club I can't remember the name of, another that was just an honors club, and the list goes on and on. I just loved taking part in these clubs because we did things to improve our lives and the lives of other people. I got to be a part of something bigger. For me, it was just a perk that it made my college applications look nice.

When I got to college, I had a bunch of new friends back home that I really missed. If I was involved in clubs, I would lose touch with them, and I wanted to focus on being social for once and also get through my freshman year with my regular 4.0. For those reasons, I only joined a sorority and nothing else; and I wasn't even that involved in my sorority. I don't regret that decision for a second because it eventually led to me becoming as close to my friends as I did and to Alexey, of course.

But now that I'm here, I see that I'm unimpressed with myself. I feel like I've accomplished a lot- met so many of my goals- but there's just something missing. Today, at a meeting I went to with my preceptor, I realized what that was. I really miss being involved. On committees. By volunteering (other than my measly attempts to show up to the humane society once a month). As a member of a group. All of that. The group today was full of ladies that work together to improve the lives of their employees through wellness programs. I wasn't even aware that programs like that existed in Lawrence, or that they were going so well and doing so much.

It also made me realize something else. The speaker at this meeting was from Bert Nash, and she made me realize that A) I have not been taking good care of my mental health as of late and B) I've stopped talking about it. I'm, thankfully, not slipping back into a depression again, but I just haven't been preventing myself from that happening again. I also feel like I've stopped trying to break down the stigma of mental health, simply because I've lost track of time and haven't blogged about it in a while. It was incredibly easy to talk about depression when I was going through it, but now that I'm out of it, I just completely stopped talking about it. I suppose part of my reasoning for that is that it was a scary time, and I don't really want to revisit it, but it's mostly just about forgetting. But just like IBS- even when I feel good, I keep blogging about it. Because eventually I'm going to say something that someone out there needed to hear to help them or change their mind.

With that said, anyone want to attend the Mental Health First Aid classes with me? I can't go until probably May or sometime after that. But it's $30 (currently) for 4 3hr sessions. Here's a link with more info.